Assertive Communication

Communication is a process that requires various styles to put across the message to the audiences. As such we embellishes our speech with decorative words and expression so as to persuade and entice the listeners. At this moment in time am going to discuss with you on “assertive” as a style of communication. Language and facts have to be dressed in style just like fashion. Watson (1998) quotes Charle's Dickens in his book “Hard Times” “ Just like in Life, in education facts! facts and more facts are important”. Therefore any communication made should be based on facts and I mean valid and strong facts. Facts are star-born and difficult if not impossible to delete and make sense to the intended audiences. Time is precious and as such it is important not to waste peoples time by waffling. Get to the subject topic with clear facts to decipher the message. As a lecturer and avid reader, l always insist that facts should be allowed to manifest itself whenever need be. Be it a speech, conversation and social chat let facts stand and be counted to the interpreter. Facts are based on clear ideas that can be counted assessed , evaluated and quantified by whoever. Facts gives us confidence and are time effective. You gain respect, love and audience by issuing them in numbers. In a conversation facts are effective and healthiest form of communication that can lead one to what is termed “ assertive style of communication”. It is the mannerism in which we spontaneously select terms and shoo them to express ourselves when our self-esteem is intact. Assertive Communication often giving us the confidence to communicate without games and manipulation. Be it that your audience will be left clicking their tongs, in stitches, shading off tears or smiling, admiring your language command or carelessness, facts should be counted and be heard straight from the speakers mouths. Speakers who are assertive, work hard to create mutually satisfying solutions. This enable both the decipher and interpreter to decode the message with less effort which fosters effective communications. Who ever is speaking or communicating should make his or here needs clearly and forthrightly understood. Assertive communicators strive to create and maintain a strong which enhances a win/win negotiations. As an assertive communicator you know your limits and refuse to be pushed beyond them just because someone else wants or needs something from us. For example if you want your car to be serviced in time and get to work. It should be said out clearly, simple that you expect the service to be down in your anticipated time. You give reasons why it should be like that. I have noted with concern in every day life that people especially in Africa avoid assertive style of communication in fear that they will be called names or that they will be perceived as arrogant yet this is the most effective and powerful style of putting the message across to your work mate, friends and relatives. In my tribe and community in Zimbabwe l observed that people use assertive style of communication less than other styles of communication such as aggressive and passive communication.

Female communication through their body language

Caven Masuku Communication is a process where two or more people constantly exchange codes and signal verbal or non-verbal in order to create a mutual understanding. It need two or more people to rightly interpret the codes and signal without missing it. In this article, though I will touch on men in passing my major discussion will be on how female uses their body language to send codes and signal to male counterparts especially those they would have loved. With the knowledge that I have acquired and the wisdom that I gain almost on daily basis I found out that non-verbal communication can be clearly defined by the sex. Male communicate differently with their bodies as compared to women. I find women bodies more interesting to analyse the way they communicate to men without uttering a word. It is magnetic and is one attempt that men can not resist despite how strong, moral or faithful one is. I can testify this through the manner I yielded to my wife when I first saw her. In Zimbabwe most men of my age have admitted that they cherish the way women communicate through their physical stature without moving their lips to utter a single word. The world is fascinating because we have beautiful, soft spoken and natural talented creatures who can use all the God given assets to send the message around to the opposite sex. Women body language as compared to men body language are more submissive. A woman’s body language provides a non-verbal way to say “Don’t worry, it’s safe to approach me. I won’t resist you.” This is one message that I always fall trap of when I meet someone of opposite sex. Be it at work, church, home, social gathering women always display that submissive body language that invite men. Femininity is an element that draws men closer to women and make them feel great through their macho egoism. Her language reflects a time when females needed to choose the best possible mate to father their children and ensure continuation of the species. With the new generation females can got to an extend of displaying such element at close range with conditions set for the targeted audience to fall the trap. Not to mention mass communication through advertisement on day to day basis we have been experiencing some of these. As some one with an academic spirit I wish if communicologist's can study the use of body language by women to entice their male counterparts. They is too much science that I can not be able to discuss on how women magnetic body attracts male counterparts. The next time you want to show someone you are interested, remember the important connection between attraction and body language. Men just like women should learn to use confident body language to increase their chances of success with the opposite sex. It is common sense that women too fall he trap to men's body language. Most of my female friends including my wife have shared with me how males can cause rolling heads to female counterparts through body language. In addition, it is salient to recognize the various signals that men and women use to reveal whether they are interested in someone. Many a times I have found women gazing men uncontrollable. The opposite is true with men to women. Both men and women should know that the rest of their body can speak louder than any words they say. A body is a weapon through which commands can be issued. Communication is all about exchange of codes or signal by two or more people in order to reach mutual understanding. So give your mouth a break and let your body language do the talking!